THE SPOILED UNDER-30 CROWD!!!
If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their
tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up;
what, with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning .... uphill
BOTH ways yadda, yadda, yadda!
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way
in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how
hard I had it and how easy they've got it!
But now that... I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help
but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so
easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a dang
Utopia!
And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've
got it!
I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we
wanted to know something, we had to go to the darn library and look it
up ourselves, in the card catalog!!
There was no email! We had to actually write somebody a letter...with a
pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in
the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!
There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to
hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself!
Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd
usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!
We didn't have fancy stuff like Call Waiting! If you were on the
phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! And
we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you
had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss,
your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't
know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances mister!
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with
high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like
'Space Invaders' and 'asteroids' and the graphics sucked! Your guy was a
little square! You actually had to use your imagination! And there were
no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you
could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster
and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!
When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium
seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some old
broad with a hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see, you were just
screwed!
Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like
15 channels and there was no onscreen menu and no remote control! You
had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on!
You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off
your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no
Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning.
Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you
spoiled little brats!
And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had
to use the stove or go build a frigging fire .... imagine that!
If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and
shake it over the stove forever like an idiot.
That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too
easy. You're spoiled!!!!!!!!!
You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980!
Oh yea, and a seatbelt was Mom throwing her arm across your chest every
time she hit the brakes.
Regards,
The over 30 Crowd
